I used to be naive. At the age of 18 I was entirely too close to getting the following lines from The Tragedy of Julius Caesar tattooed on my body:
Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
(II.2.32-33)
I breathe in gratitude every day for not having gone through with this. The reason is not that the lines have lost their power and beauty for me, the entire speech is still perhaps my favorite from all of Shakespeare. It's that I realize I may as well have tattooed the word hypocrite on my face. I have died more times than I am willing to admit, my foundations have buckled and I, like so many others, have crumbled. I see now that to be valiant is not to live a life without ever dying. It is to emerge from the ashes reborn. If Caesar is correct, and the valiant never taste of death but once, then valiancy can only be achieved by robots and/or individuals with emotional disabilities.
In Julius Caesar when the senators stab the emperor repeatedly, the final blow is dealt by Caesar's closest friend, Brutus, bringing forth the famous line "Et tu, Brute?" And you, Brutus? The line consists of only three words, but they are perhaps the most powerful three words in literature. All who have experienced a similar epiphanic moment can feel Caesar's pain. He says, "And you, my closest friend and companion, you of all the people in the world? I could expect this from my worst enemies, but how could this come from you?" After Caesar's death, Shakespeare provides the play with a savior, someone to project the fallen emperor's emotions for all to understand. Marc Antony speaks the following lines to a crowd of spectators over Caesar's dead body;
If you have tears prepare to shed them now...
For Brutus, as you know, was Caesar's angel.
Judge, O you gods, how dearly Caesar loved him!
This was the most unkindest cut of all.
Ingratitude, more strong than traitors' arms,
Quite vanquished him. Then burst his mighty heart,
(III.2.178-183)
For anyone who has experienced death such as this, a savior is always one's greatest desire. Once the realization sets in that the past reality no longer exists, the next impulse is to disperse the weight from the absent foundation among those that that still remain. Our way of doing this is to talk with others, for it seems the simple knowledge that others understand one's suffering is a comfort. In Caesar's case, he is no longer able to speak for himself, and so Antony bears the fallen weight.
In reality, there are rarely Marc Antonies waiting to take up one's cause. There is only you, and emerging from the debris is a solitary, lonely business. This is where I believe the true essence of valiancy lies. To never taste the bitterness of betrayal is easy; to never have one's identity shattered and put through the fires of hell is possible for even the simplest of insects. But to rebuild oneself stronger than before is something only the truly valiant can accomplish. There is no virtue that can shield us from our mortality, both physical and emotional.We are all phoenixes, destined to die and be reborn from our ashes.
As Virgil says,
sunt lacrimae rerum,
et mentum mortalia tangunt.
These are the tears of things,
And the stuff of our mortality cuts us to the bone.
